Honesty and The Ethics Communication Skills

Selling has a murky reputation, ask anyone. Salespeople are infamous for their deceptive practices. Would you buy a used car from a salesman?

I said all of that to get it out of the way before you thought it. Yes, it’s clear that sales is an activity without the shining reputation of politicians, lawyers, real estate agents and journalists. Ok, I am kidding, there.

So what am I on about in suggesting that honesty has an important place in selling? There are two reasons. The first is the rather obvious moral one; it is a good thing for other people, society and the planet if there is more rather than less honesty.

The second is not as self-evident. When a person deceives, or rather attempts to, he or only makes a so-so job of it. What I mean is that even if they can manage to utter deceptive words, body language, micro gestures and delivery give the game away.

With all the news about terrorism and security issues, there has been much coverage of how information is obtained when suspects are interviewed. One key indicator of deception is hesitation in supplying (making up) an answer. The other is that when a person is lying, it takes so much brain effort that they don’t produce the body activity which is normal when someone is giving a description of an event or situation which has really occurred.

I’m passing on this information to you but there’s really no need, because everybody always reads body language all the time. That is a very definite statement, so let me give you the justification. Before humans evolved speech, they, like other animals, still communicated with one another. A mixture of grunts, squeals and body language was the medium. Everybody became skilled at it – since survival depended on being able to recognise danger.

We still have that mechanism. It operates unconsciously all the time. The way it informs us about the intentions of others isn’t by delivering a word-message. Instead we get feelings. You take to someone, feel relaxed in their company, or are put-off and made cautious when you sense falseness.

If a person is honest in what they say, their body language confirms the words. Certain gestures are characteristic of honesty. And because our skill at reading body-language is so acute, we can spot fakers very fast. So even when a politician is schooled in such gestures as the ‘open palm’ and the ‘direct gaze’ other micro-clues give them away. Look at dancers who wear ‘professional smiles’ for an example.

A great thing about honesty in sales is that it permits you to be spontaneous and genuine in your enthusiasm for what you are selling. Enthusiasm is catching and highly convincing. What’s more by being honest you avoid any nagging doubt about the value of what you are doing for your customers.

If this seems pollyanna-ish to you because there are situations where a ‘white lie seems justified, be careful. People aren’t stupid, you’ll get found out and when that happens you’ve lost repeat business and referrals.

Try being honest – you might like it :-)

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Tags: communication, skills, interpersonal, training, presentation